Ode to Change.
Whenever I start something - mostly creative, but even some other things - usually about halfway through I go, “Wait, no, no, no, let’s do this again.” I either get a better idea, have learned as I went along and want to incorporate this knew knowledge, or just plain think I can do better. It’s all part of the knowingly impossible quest for perfection that makes me such a stereotypical Virgo it hurts. It’s not that I can’t relax, accept things as they are or throw caution to the wind, it’s just that I generally make a conscious decision to do those things, which reduces the spotenaiety factor.
This blog, for example, certainly hasn’t turned out how I originally intended, and I will likely end up steering it more towards what I want to be. So consider this a heads up. Mostly this just means more content, less bullshit. Hopefully that’s ok with you, and if not, no hard feelings if you decide to unfollow. Seriously.
I’m thinking of revamping T-Sides, too. I love my blog and all that it’s given me, and that’s part of what makes me strive for it encompass more. Part of me worries that as I include more topics it seems less focused, too scattered, but it’s also kind of already like that, and the way I see it, anything that drives more people to read, gives me more reasons to update is for the best. Thing is, I don’t think there’s anything I can accomplish with T-Sides that’s new to the world of music blogging. There are so many different varieties of music blog out there, and it seems a bit redundant and silly to be adding my own ingredients to an overflowing pot. I’d rather just start my own damn sauce, so to speak. I have a lot of ideas and ways to approach them, and covering only music feels like a limitation at this point. I’d like to turn it into something that captures the human experience of culture as closely as possible. Does everyone hear or see something right when it’s released? Hell no! Plenty of people discover things years and years later, so why all the pressure to be so new? And in my opinion, culture generally intersects. I watch this tv show and hear this song, so I download this album, which leads me to this artist… that kind of thing. Not only do I want to capture the essence of a creation, I want to capture how it is experienced, discovered and shared. The only thing that’s stopped me from doing it thus far is the worry that it’s too ambitious, but then again, most of the music, books, movies I like are often called too ambitious, so maybe that’s exactly what I need.
Sometimes it just feels necessary to have a clean slate to do what you really want to do - I think that’s why I like New Year’s Eve so much, new relationships (friendships and romances), all of that. They’re new chances to be the best version of yourself that you feel you can. Then again, I always liked that quote from Vanilla Sky - “Every passing minute is a another chance to turn it all around.” You know, I think that’s true. It’s just a matter of thinking of it that way.
Here’s to turning it around.